Friday, November 29, 2019
What to Do When Nobody Listens to You at Work - The Muse
What to Do When Nobody Listens to You at Work - The MuseWhat to Do When Nobody Listens to You at Work Youre in a team meeting, hashing out how to resolve an issue that everybody has been repeatedly battling with.What if we changed the process so that the sales team saw the report first? you suggest, That way the plan team could step in with all of the information there- without having to re-format graphics later.Perhaps a few somewhat courteous colleagues mutter a maybe or a nonchalant that could work, but then the conversation quickly moves on to something different. Youre annoyed, but you decide to let it go for now.The next week youre in that regular team-wide meeting, and the same problem is on the table for discussion. One of your co-workers chimes in with, You know, I was thinking about this- what if we changed the process so that the sales team saw the report first?You can hardly believe what youre hearing. Not only is he speaking up with the exact suggestion you pitched brde week, but everyones nodding along as if thats the greatest idea since the lightbulb. Ive been there, so I know how frustrating this is. Knowing that your voice isnt heard is enough to make you ball up your fists and clench your jaw, and its made even worse by the feeling that youre totally helpless. What can you do- aside from apparently try to speak louder?Well, heres the good news There are a couple of things you can try when nobody listens to you at work. The Moment You Feel Ignored Advocate for YourselfWhen everybody just breezes by your contribution without so much as a second glance, whats your first reaction? If youre anything like me, it involves rolling your eyes and making a strongly-worded mental leide to vent about that situation later.But, what does that actually accomplish for you? Nothing.The moment that you feel like your idea isnt being given the consideration it deserves, dont be afraid to gently push for a continued conversation. Meet those noncommittal maybes wit h some thoughtful questions, such asDo you think that could work?Do you see any issues with that approach?What would be our next step in getting that implemented?Itll be a lot harder for people to leave your idea in the dust if youre forcing them (respectfully, of course) to consider it. If you do that and youre still stuck in that Twilight Zone scenario in which a colleague spits out your same suggestion and gets a totally different reaction? Go ahead- speak up and ask something like, Can you explain how thats different from what I suggested in last weeks meeting?Your co-worker will likely be slack-jawed in response, and- while its not your goal to embarrass him or come off as condescending- thats an effective way to remind people that you actually do have some valuable thoughts to share. After You Speak Up Approach Your supervisorinWhen youre used to having your ideas steamrolled or forgotten, I know that speaking up in that way can feel a little aggressive- and, your team members might even be a little taken aback by the fact that youre suddenly standing up for yourself. Afterwards, its smart to approach your boss for a brief one-on-one conversation. During that chat, you can explain that you hope you didnt come off as too forward, but that you want to make sure that youre heard and able to make a valuable contribution to your team.You can also ask your boss something like, Is there something else I should be doing to ensure that my voice is heard in these meetings?Not only does this soften the blow by placing at least a little of the responsibility back on your shoulders, but it can also open your eyes to any team norms you might not be aware of.For example, if youre new to the company, perhaps youre not in the loop on the fact that they have a brainstorming session at the end when you could chime in- because they prefer to not have other people jumping in while others are talking.You dont always want to assume malicious intent when you feel you arent bein g heard. So, make sure you have these important conversations and cover your bases before you jump to conclusions.When Nothing Is Changing Start Your HuntYouve done everything you can think of. Youve spoken up and advocated for your ideas in team meetings. Youve sat down with your boss (a couple of times, actually) to explain to her that you feel like your contributions arent being given equal weight. And yet, absolutely nothing is improving. You still feel just as ignored and unheard.Now what? Well, my friend, heres the brutal truth Its probably time for you to start looking for a workplace where both you and your ideas are valued. You deserve that much.Does that mean youre entitled to a team in which every single one of your suggestions is met with applause and then implemented immediately? Absolutely not- every idea you have wont be a good one. However, you are justified in expecting a certain amount of respect and acknowledgement.So, if you truly do feel like youll continue to g o unnoticed in the office- despite your best efforts to change that- it could be a sign of a larger problem within the organization, as opposed to something to do with you specifically. I know firsthand how discouraging it can be to feel like absolutely nobody listens to what you have to say in the office. And, its a tricky situation to navigate.Fortunately, there are a few things you can do to make it a little less easy to ignore you. Give these suggestions a go, and youll hopefully feel supported- rather than steamrolled.
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